I finally feel happy to talk about the journey that I have written about in my new book Undercover: A Novel of a Life. Writing the book has certainly helped me come to terms with what happened in the last number of years. At last I can talk about my experiences without being overwhelmed with emotion, I am finally relaxed. Over the last four years I have felt pain, I haven’t slept well, and I have been trying to hide the secret of my life from my family and friends. I just couldn’t talk about it.
Today, for the first time I feel relief, like a dark cloud has been lifted from me. It is such a relief to let go of some of the stress and not be in a state where I constantly feel like I have to be looking over my shoulder. I feel better now that I have had the opportunity to discuss my life as it is written in the book.
My family and close friends have just learned about my life as an “undercover agent” for the DEA in Mexico, they are having a difficult time coping with this knowledge. I am hopeful that they too will feel relief, in time, by reading and hearing my story.
Last Tuesday I had my second interview on the radio with Triple M Melbourne with Eddie McGuire and his team and I felt a little uncomfortable talking about my book, but today I was relaxed during my interview. I really appreciated the chat with Adam Spencer from ABC Sydney (airing this Wednesday on ABC 702 Breakfast Show), his manner and his approach to the book made me realise that there are people out there who want to hear my story and travel the journey with me.